NEW - Miracle Cure!

[jack schitt]

NEW - Miracle Cure!

· Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
· Do you suffer from shyness?
· Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your
doctor or pharmacist about White Wine.

White Wine is the safe, natural way to feel better and more
confident about yourself and your actions. White Wine can
help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world
That you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost
immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses you can
overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life
you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of
the past and you will discover many talents you never knew
you had. Stop hiding and start living, with White Wine.

However, White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women who
are pregnant or nursing should not use White Wine.

However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming
pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting,
incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control,
loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity,
delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration,
dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night
rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.


WARNING:

The consumption of White Wine may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The consumption of White Wine is a major factor in dancing
like an idiot.
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The consumption of White Wine may cause you to tell your
friends over and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The consumption of White Wine may cause you to think you can
sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The consumption of White Wine may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four
in the morning.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The consumption of White Wine may make you think you can
logically converse with members of the opposite sex without
spitting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
The consumption of White Wine may create the illusion that
you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than
most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
The consumption of White Wine may lead you to think people
are laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

NOW JUST IMAGINE WHAT YOU COULD ACHIEVE WITH RED WINE!

[MarcusMaximus]

I have been using another product that seems to have many of the same effects - Beer.

The nectar of the gods fights cancer and heart disease, promotes intelligence and a slimline physique and bestows riches upon the quaffer.

Experts recommend beer:
as a means of losing weight; because it accelerates the passing of urine and water from the body;

because it regulates blood pressure and is useful in cases of anemia and exhaustion;

because it increases blood flow in the heart, kidneys and brain;

because it stimulates the activity of the kidneys and stomach acid, and tranquilizes with the help of lupulin and hops;

because it is helpful in cases of constipation, excess stomach acid and cellulite;

because its biochemical structure stimulates the metabolism;

because of vitamin H, which is helpful in dermatology, as biotin prevents hair loss and dandruff;

because of its dietary value: it contains partly disintegrated substances which are not only easy to digest, but also stimulate the digestion of food that is consumed while drinking beer;

because it is hygienically faultless: its low pH value and the antiseptic effect of alcohol and the bitter substances of hops prevent the evolution of pathogenic micro-organisms;

because it has a tranquilizing effect on the nervous system, which is specially true in the treatment of aged people, whose psychological problems are mostly connected to arterioscleroses phenomena which limit blood flow to the brain;

because it contains not only tranquilizers, but alcohol, which widens the veins and accelerates blood circulation, which is an additional tranquilizing effect.

beer has been allowing unattractive people to form sexual liaisons since the dawn of time.

Cheers.