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Pursuit and Distance in Online Dating
‘Pursuit and distance’ is a term given to describe how humans engage in relationships, it is about balance, there is the ‘pursuer’ and the ‘escapee’ and it can be applied to man and wife, parent and child, worker and employee, even friends can sometimes play this difficult game.
Pursuit and Distance In Day To Day Life
This dance of chase and avoidance has been covered in books, poems, literature and films for a very long time, it is a part of human nature. It is a popular subject and one which has been highlighted recently in the Golden Globe award winning ITV1 drama ‘Downton Abbey’. Set in ‘God’s Country’ (Yorkshire). The two lead characters of this quintessentially English costume drama, engage fully in the dance of pursuit and distance. Viewers can relate very well to the script, as will all have taken part in the dance of pursuit and distance at some time or another.
Pursuit and distance is a popular subject for those who specialise in psychological patterns and research. It is studied and written about from marriage counseling to family counseling and can be used in therapy to help pursuers understand their actions and hopefully change their behavior to live a more fruitful and rewarding life and not one based on an endless chase.
It is a fine balance and one which we, as humans, play every day. It could be a mother missing her son who has flown the nest, it’s a hard lesson but children have to make their own way at some point in life and a parent has to understand the boundaries so as not to become a hindrance, whilst still enjoying a happy balanced relationship with their child or children. It could be between two friends, one friend is a bit too keen and can’t understand why the more he or she tries to arrange nights out the less it seems to happen.
Pursuit and distance is usually a game we play and understand without realising, but some times, in certain situations, it can lead to displays of obsessive behaviour. Imagine pursuit and distance as a pendulum, it swings from side to side in a relationship, but in some cases, if pushed too hard from one side it can swing too heavily in the one direction; the more one person pursues, the more the other person tries to avoid contact.
Pursuit and Distance & Online Dating
With the above in mind, we can use the equation for a successful and happy time in online dating.
By respecting and understanding this game of ‘kiss chase’ when meeting someone new, we can get so much more from dating sites.
An online dating site is simply a database full of single people all looking for their special ‘someone’ to date, whether it be for love, friendship or a casual fling. But the way in which we use the site can determine how successful we are.
It is easy to assume that just because someone is there in front of us on the screen they’re ‘up for chatting’ and just because someone has viewed your profile, they will a) want a relationship and b) reply to an email in minutes. In reality, it is fair to assume that if you don’t receive a reply from an email after that person has viewed your profile, there will be no point in sending a third or fourth email. Even if you do receive an email, by appearing too keen you can become a ‘pursuer’ and early on in a friendship, this will not come across well to a prospective partner.
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The celeb gossip sites and tabloid newspapers and magazines feast – prosper and create mayhem about stars and celebrities much of the stuff they write about is the real deal – the rest well call it what you like the usual disclaimers are rumors – or an unnamed third party said – get the drift – shall we just say it’s in the main entertainment gossip!
Here is a typical example Susan Boyle the Scottish singing sensation – she does not do drugs – she never dates and she has never had sex in her life. So how do the celeb gossip writers build a story around Susan Boyle. Easy they follow her with a paparazzi camera man get some good shots let’s say as Susan Boyle steps out of a taxi cab in London and the wind blows her hair all over the place. Wham they have the base to set up the story now for the headline descriptor – Susan Boyle Sexy Hair Show in London – now the reality is there was nothing sexy to write about but you need ‘Sexy’ to grab the attention to capture millions of eyeballs! Then you kick off the first line Susan Boyle looks sexy as she is about to enter (a leading brand name) fashion shop.
That’s the meat of the story the three essentials are – the star Susan Boyle – the eyeball grabber ‘Sexy’ – and the fashion brand name that will ensure advertisers will buy up all the ad spots around the article – That’s it folks how to set up a gossip press article.
Celebs like Susan Boyle are just Cannon Fodder for the Gossip Press…
Did you read the descriptor – ‘Demi Moore the latest Celeb Drug Abuse Victim’ – what ‘Victim’ my ass! This is yet one example of an aging spoilt plastic Hollywood never was, who cannot even control who enters and leaves the inside of her panties. So how can anyone expect her to have any control with the drugs she pops whether prescription or hard drugs, it is all the same the woman is out of control in fact she has never been in control!
It gets tiresome writing about the likes of Demi Moore as at best, all she deserves is to be ridiculed or maybe even more relative thrown on the scrapheap like what happened with her husband Ashton Kutcher (another loser but more on him some day soon) who gets fed up with pounding the silicone Hollywood train wreck of a woman.
One can imagine a typical day for Demi Moore get up look in the mirror – then spend the next three hours in the bathroom – exit the bathroom – look in the mirror – get the driver/chauffeur to take her to the beauty parlor for a series of Botox treatment – leave there after 4 hours – look in the mirror – go pill popping some place drink some coffee and have the meal of the day half a croissant – another two hours gone – look in the mirror – go home and retreat to the bathroom for another three hours – surface again – look in the mirror – go down the hair salon for two hours – exit – look in the mirror – Damn I am done writing about that silly bitch!
Demi Moore is no drug abuse victim she is a headcase!
Demi Moore the latest Celeb Drug Abuse Victim…
Whitney Houston has run out of money her desperate ‘Crack Cocaine’ addiction has sucked millions of USD dollars out of her bank accounts. Leaving her down and out at only 48 years of age. now reduced to calling up friends to borrow a 100 bucks here and there. So some may say it’s only Whitney Houston who cares!
Well we care here at OZAMI and we do not want to be seen taking the ‘Moral High Ground’ but the sad case of Whitney Houston does matter and we trust that anyone and everyone who reads this article will realize what drug abuse can do to anyone including a legendary diva like Whitney Houston.
A plea from OZAMI PLEASE SAY NO TO DRUGS!
Or you too may end up like Whitney Houston.
This is from the Whitney Houston record company – quote “Whitney’s fortune is gone,” – more – “Music industry heavy hitters are supporting her and her label is fronting her cash against her next album, but no one knows when that will be released.”
Whitney Houston is one of the biggest selling singers of all times and a 6 times Grammy Award winning artist.
Down the years Whitney Houston has had a string of hits but all those achievements seem nothing in light of the terrible crack cocaine abuse that has wrecked her career and taken a huge toll on her health – It’s not pretty writing about a tragedy like Whitney Houston! We can only hope she can get help!
Whitney Houston Runs Out of Money…
Worcester
West Midlands
England
Well now that the British public are led to believe that nightclub bouncers are really ‘Venue Managers’ the world of hype takes a new nonsensical lunge towards complete an utter stupidity!
To showcase what we mean here are the Venue Managers at work in Tramps nightclub in Worcester, Lisa Woodman a saucy 28 year old blonde (out of a bottle of course) pitches up at the nightclub door all size 6 of her with huge 36DD mammaries the type Wayne Rooney likes to slap around as he enters from the rear. Lisa Woodman is wearing a low-cut top, short skirt and knee-length boots. Now all she is doing is getting dressed up like a tramp to get into Tramps nightclub in Worcester!
She was refused entry by the Venue Manager he said – quote – : “You’re too old to wear that get-up.” And then the steroid freak bouncer turned Lisa Woodman away from the club door.
Lisa Woodman made these comments – quote – ‘I always like to look sexy when I go out on the town.’ Lisa has dropped out four babies in recent years, so she has undergone breast enhancement to get everything back shipshape!
Bouncer Mistakes Lisa Woodman for a Tramp at Tramps…
Legend
Nightclub Bouncer – Local beefcake often thinks EPL footballers are intelligent! Have difficulty explaining why they are hooked on steroids. Believe they have the power to say how WAGs should dress to gain nightclub entry.
3 Nightclubs in Worcester are owned by the same company – Tramps – Modes – Velvet. Lisa Woodman is barred from all three.
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